I have to be honest about how nervous I’ve been lately- so before you engage with the blog, let’s take a moment to practice some intentional breathing.
I want you to inhale for 4 counts: breathing in all of the stress, the worry, the doubt. And hold that for 2 counts: sitting with those burdens momentarily; and exhale for 6 counts: blow it all out. And you can repeat it a few times until you truly feel your nerves have relaxed.
Now-into the night before.
Date: July 5th eve.
A fashion show. A pretty big one. A personal one. Is occurring tomorrow!
I should be excited, I should be glowing, and in a lot of ways I am. But honestly, I’m tired.
Do we talk about what it costs to pursue a dream, when your reality is pursuing you?
They want it back in blood HAHHAAA.
No- I have this tendency of joking when I’m at my lowest. Reality is the holiday didn’t postpone the due dates, the nails are not done, the toes are crusty: and she looks fairly unprepared. That’s the truth.
The night before doesn’t feel very calm nor did it arrive with ease: it feels like “I’m pushing anyways,” and bruh!! The survival code, the making it do what it do: when is it just gone do what I need it to do hahha.
Okay for real.
Tomorrow isn’t just a fashion show. This is a redo. Alright here’s the tale:
Long ago…
It was 2023.
I’ve had this dream to model for years. And I took part in my biggest development that year. I did a show in July: Light Up Livernois hosted annually on the Avenue of Fashion. And-I hated my performance. Nothing I’d add to my highlight reel. So, to be involved with this year’s show: I’ve taken it personally. This is for me. I am modeling for me, I am showing up for me, and that looks like:
- Booking a wax to avoid repeating moments that created doubt in my ability.
- Determined to look flawless even in the midst of feeling flawed.
- Practicing even in the little moments.
That’s the runway moment that truly matters.
It’s about knowing I showed up when I could’ve stayed in the shadows. It’s about the silent victories, pushing through the noise, and finally saying, “I’m here.. again” teehee.
This is my reclaiming. My walk, my look, my moment.
A journey unfolding is one with many twists and turns, as they say. And if you’re ever at a point where you’ve become a little too dizzy. Ground yourself by banking on you. “I do this for me” and choose to do so. Tomorrow, I will be.
See you on the runway.
k bye
Robyn
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